Nov 25 2005
The minutes I did not trusted God…
There’s this… show here in the Philippines called Game ka na ba? by Kris Aquino. It’s a very educated show and you will know a lot and discover a lot of things through questions and their answers.
One time… there was this man (I forgot his name) He is very smart or let me change that… very intelligent. He became champion from monday to friday (the old rule of Game ka na was everyday right?) so.. okay.. He won the contest from monday to friday. We expected him to win on Saturday…
Did He win? No. On saturday he lost and did not win the million pesos.
So what is your point here Chette? you see, even a really really smart person can’t know everything. When we say God is all knowing (omnicient), we’re pointing out an important difference between God and human beings. Humans build their knowledge from the bottom up; when we’re born, we’re blank slate, and then we slowly start to learn about our world. We hope to keep learning - writing knowledge on that slate - our entire lives. God, on the other hand, possesses knowledge from the top down. He knows all things because He created all things. The universe was a blank slate, and from his own mind God filled in all the details as he crated them. it was wrong for me to disobey Him and start working on my own.
Earlier… I lost to a battle in Chess because..
(1). I believed in myself
(2). I panicked.
Unlike yesterday… I won 2 games.. not because I depend on myself… but because I depend on GOD. A human (even a Christian) cannot be perfect. There is still this battle between the old and new self. And even today, when I am alone… I can’t help but to think or regret that me… a Christian… who talks like this… encourage like this… share like this… even in one point… or even in one game.. I.. have trusted myself… and not depend on God. *cries* My first game was a default but that didn’t stop me from not having a chance of being "GOLD" it was my own fault. I panicked… I believed in myself and not depend on God.
Father God… I know I have ask for your forgiveness earlier…but still right now.. a confession even here in public.. I ask for your forgiveness, of not depending on you. And at the same time… I Thank you for even though I have disobeyed you… You still gave me a "Silver" medal. That silver medal… everytime I will look at it, I will always always remember that there was once in my time… I have not trusted you and trusted myself.. and I have failed… Now… I will trust you more coz apart from you… I CAN DO NOTHING. I am nothing.. without you…
